return my video game
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
im six kinds of drunk right now
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
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