you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
