I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize