just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
it glows. i had to have it.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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