tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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