it was like eating out sand paper
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Randomize
