yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
