with your own penis?
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
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