god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
