Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
