its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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