i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
