butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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