don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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