Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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