we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I need water and some morals
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
