It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
