he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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