I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
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