I want to make a zoo with you.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
