What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
