The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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