maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize