Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize