Midget sex pt 2 tonight
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
she woke up with a sticky ear
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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