Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
