Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
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