I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize