Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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