Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
