left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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