Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
It's just like the Real World with babies
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize