brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
