I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize