Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
