hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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