So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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