Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
