No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
