The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Randomize
