when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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