Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Randomize