You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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