If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Randomize
