Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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