but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize