She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
