no. you can't hotbox the world.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize
