it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
