Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
